1. No, you can't swap gears from different manufacturers. Chrysler axles only fit Chrysler axle housings, Dana gears only fit Dana housings, etc..
2. You can use the XJ 8.25, but you'll need to remove the XJ spring perches and weld in new perches for the MJ. They have different spacing..
3. Regearing the MJ D44 is the best option I think, but re-perching the 4.10 8.25 would be cheaper. Both axles are good, but I prefer the D44's.