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are you a helper?


brdhntr
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i am. all the neighbors come to me to fix everything or do anything. i pull over when i see someone pulled over along the road. i jump start for people when needed. i'll help anyway i can. today i pulled out a mailman in his delivery truck. i always have at least 1 tow rope in all my trucks and jumper cables in every vehicle. this winter i've pulled 16 people out and jumped 10. heck, i even leave a bunch of airhose on a real on the outside of my garage that fits across the street in case someone needs to air up a tire or the neighborhood kids can air up their bike tires. man, i've gone through 3 keeper tow straps this year already. i snowblow out all the neighbors. i let friends and neighbors borrow my saws and other tools. yep, i'm a helper.

 

my wife was out today scraping some ice. neighbors were outside putzing around, playing with their kids. no one came over to help her out. i got stuck a while back and no one stopped to pull me out. when i snapped a tow strap no one has offered to replace it. no one has even given me a dime for gas for the snowblower.

 

my wife says i need to help others less. she may be right, but i just can't do it. helping out is part of who i am. all i ask is that when i help someone out, they pay it forward and help out someone else (or us when we need it). why don't people just help each other anymore? what's going on? :huh???:

 

sorry. i just had to vent. it ticked me off that nobody came over to help my wife out and someone left my airhose strung out to the street so the end froze to the ground. then one of the neighbors brought back my compound miter saw that i let them use with the guard broken off. oh well, whatcha gonna do? :shake:

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Funny. I was reading this and called my wife in to read it. She said "Oh my God , there's two of you". I do basically everything you just mentioned. Just Wed the neighbor kid came in my garage & wanted to know if I could fix his bike tire because his dad didn't have time he was drinking beer & watching TV. So I did it. It never ends. And yes I get a little pissed for the very reasons you do when people take and take & never even consider helping others or doing something in return, or don't give a s--- if they destroy property they borrow and never have any intention of reimbursing you for it.

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I feel your pain. :thumbsup: But at the very least, I think you might need to buy a better quality strap. :yes:

 

 

that's funny! :rotf: i buy the keeper brand tow straps. i think they're about the best. i usually get 2" x 20'. the main problem is pulling large vehicle out that are really stuck and the rubbing against stuff. i haven't actually snapped some, they just tore and freyed. 1 did snap. when i pull people out i make them hook it to their vehicle (well i do it for women) so i'm not responsible for any damage. i've been blamed for broken parts before, so i make them do it. unfortunately, this means they don't always hook it in the best spot for the tow strap and it gets damaged.

 

i told my wife the other day that i'd be ordering a few more keeper tow straps this week. she is excited! ;)

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I help people out when I can, and in the past never really got any help when I could use it, but what do you do? I help people because I like to help people. Other people sit on their @$$ watching TV instead of fixing their kid's bicycle tire because they like to watch TV and don't like to fix tires or spend time with their kids. I don't understand people like that, I don't try to understand them.

 

I used to get worked up about stuff like that when I was younger. As I'm getting older I don't let it get to me any more.

 

I'm happy with the neighbourhood I live in now; much better than the old one. Next door used to be the town's party house, but since the owner kicked his room mates out, let his girlfriend move and and got married he grew up a lot, and took after the neighbours helping out when he can. Neighbour next to him always uses his snow blower to do everyone's side walk and driveway for those of us who have the driveway in front of their house. Usually also takes care of my dog when I'm out of town. Person across from him is always ready to help with carpentry or plumbing when needed or loan equipment, like his generator when the power was out. He keeps trying to get me to go to church, but that has pretty much become a private joke between us. Across from my next door neighbour keeps busy with his antique tractors (including steam powered) and usually keeps the kids entertained with his smaller toys, like a miniature thrasher powered by a kid's pedal tractor, or handing out supersoakers to all the neighbourhood kids and sending them off on a specific mission with them.

 

On top of that school is walking distance, kids' grandma (ex-mother-in-law) lives one block away and her mother (great grandma) lives half a block up the hill. I have become their go-to guy when something needs fixed over the years as well.

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I am always doing this, sometimes the wife doesn't like it, but what the hell. I have more tools them the rest of the neighbors, I clean the snow off the neighbors drives just because I like to. I really like working on jeeps, helping high school kids lift jeeps is fun, go wheeling with them, but when your out on the trail and with one of the kids. Someone breaks down, and he helps out someone else and gets no thanks just because he was there. Well there is my thanks, not for the person he helped but for the kid. You rub off on him, and the world may change.

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I used to be.

I'll tell you why I'm not anymore...

 

There was a kid in high school who always needed help with his volkswagon. at the time, I was more or less the v-dub guy at school, so I constantly helped him out working on his car and we became "friends". Someone noted him spending time at my shop working on vehicles was kinda ghey, since they thought (for some odd reason) that I was ghey...all because I'm a swimmer.

Somehow in his brain he decided I was a fag so he had to do something about it...so he slashed the roof on my vw after school one day, right as I was walking up to it. then I turned around and started walking to the liason officer's office and he followed, knife pulled. I made a quick-turn and beat the motherlovin piss out of the kid ended up breaking his nose, two ribs, and some bones in my right hand.

 

end result, I didn't get in trouble, he did. Now I only help people out on trail runs or if they're friends of mine like TNT, 89eliminator, geonovast, my buddy aaron, and my buddy zach. I'll still help women out because for the most part they're clueless as to what the problem is...had one lady once freak out because there were no working interior lights in her car (told her to turn the knob :clapping: and it worked).

 

but, basically I don't help average joe anymore because average joe doesn't help me.

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me to lol i just came in from pulling the guy across the street out of his drive way but he is the first one to throw me a 10 spot when i was done and if i need something and he can help he does :cheers: to the good people left out there

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I know what your saying. I came home yesterday to find a kid stuck in the ditch just past the house. I stood there and watched 4 people drive around him and not stop. I was afraid to try to bull him out(afraid the plastic bumper would break from the strap pulling up on it being it was onlt 6 degrees.) I was able to push him out of the ditch by hand though. Kid never even said thanks. I would hope someone else would do the same for my kid in about 16 years though. ( wife is due with our first July 17)

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I know what your saying. I came home yesterday to find a kid stuck in the ditch just past the house. I stood there and watched 4 people drive around him and not stop. I was afraid to try to bull him out(afraid the plastic bumper would break from the strap pulling up on it being it was onlt 6 degrees.) I was able to push him out of the ditch by hand though. Kid never even said thanks. I would hope someone else would do the same for my kid in about 16 years though. ( wife is due with our first July 17)

First off congrats on the new baby.I had the same thing happen to me not to long ago.I live close to a school and they were having there x-mas play.Some girl leaving the play was texting and driving and ran in the ditch(note:the ditch has no slope just a drop off about 3-4' deep) so I watch all these people drive by without stopping.So Went down there and hooked up the strap pulled her out,about this time her dad pulled up and got mad at me because he had already called a tow truck,I mean the least the guy could have done was thank me.Though by me pulling her out did save him about a 100 bux but whatever some people have no appreciation soapbox.gif stepping down now!

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I help folks out all the time and don't expect anything in return (so i don't get disappointed :headpop: ) and if they are gracious i tell them to pass it on or pay it forward. It is my nature to help when i can and hoping that there are some of us doing the same as i see here and it is great. especially when you don't have much but the know how and the hands to pick some one up who is down on luck. :cheers: some of us are here to be the good samaritan. :cheers:

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yep, i'll keep helping. today i pulled out a van. they tried to make a turn to pick up someone (it was a church van) and hit the snowbank instead. it was a big 15 passenger dodge. there were 13 people on board in their church clothes. i didn't make anyone get out. i just hooked on and gave a few tugs and got it out. i felt good about it.

 

i will always help.

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So Went down there and hooked up the strap pulled her out,about this time her dad pulled up and got mad at me because he had already called a tow truck,I mean the least the guy could have done was thank me.Though by me pulling her out did save him about a 100 bux but whatever some people have no appreciation soapbox.gif stepping down now!

 

 

Some people just don't have a clue... Honestly... That's when you offer to put the car back where it was. :nuts:

 

I look at everything on a risk basis. If it's not going to cause me any harm, or burn up excessive amounts of time, I'll give a hand where I can. I haven't pulled anyone out of the ditch this year, but that's mostly because I haven't run into anyone I could actually recover. They all either screwed up bad enough that they needed a wrecker anyways, or had already left.

 

What annoyed me (more after the fact, than at the time) was on my last trip south, I wound up witnessing a fatal accident. I was only about 800 yards back when a girl attempting to pass a line of traffic and wound up head-on-ing a guy coming the other way. Just an all around $#!&ty situation. The people she was trying to pass (there was a passing lane, FWIW) just kept going. I was thinking about it later, and she was easily far enough along side the one vehicle that they could obviously see her lose control and hit the other guy... None of them stopped. I was there for about 5 minutes before anybody came along the other way - luckily they stopped (2 people in one vehicle). Soon after a bunch of people came from the direction I was heading, and I don't think any of them stopped... And it was an obviously BAD accident scene, and it was obvious that 3 people were not enough to deal with it.

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I do what i can where i can. A few weeks ago while i was delivering pizzas i walked out the store with a couple of deliverys and this guy came up to me and asked for a jump. i said no problem so i drove down the block and gave the guy a jump. He asked me what my name was and said he was gunna give me something at the store when i got back from my deliverys(of course he just took off without ever hearing from him again). It was really no big deal to me cuz i didnt help the guy just so i would get soemthing back in return. but it did bug me that he just lied to me after i helped him out.

A few years ago i gave this couple who broke down a rid all the way across town, the guy said he had a decent truck he was selling if i was interested(and i was). he was supposed to call the next day, but no surprise he just up and disapeared.

I don't get it. when i help someone all i expect is a handshake and a thanks. they don't have to pretend to give me something in return only to lie to my face.

 

btw speaking of people just driving by people in need. a couple months ago i was driving home and noticed this guy just laying in the side walk. i was the only person that pulled over to see if he was ok(it was on a pretty busy street to). it turned out the guy was just drunk off his @$$ and felt like sleeping on the sidewalk. so the cops eventually come and ask me questions, my only responce was "i don't know the guy, just stoped to see if he was ok"...and did I get a beer out of it? NO! :shake: :D

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So Went down there and hooked up the strap pulled her out,about this time her dad pulled up and got mad at me because he had already called a tow truck,I mean the least the guy could have done was thank me.Though by me pulling her out did save him about a 100 bux but whatever some people have no appreciation soapbox.gif stepping down now!

 

 

Some people just don't have a clue... Honestly... That's when you offer to put the car back where it was. :nuts:

 

I look at everything on a risk basis. If it's not going to cause me any harm, or burn up excessive amounts of time, I'll give a hand where I can. I haven't pulled anyone out of the ditch this year, but that's mostly because I haven't run into anyone I could actually recover. They all either screwed up bad enough that they needed a wrecker anyways, or had already left.

 

What annoyed me (more after the fact, than at the time) was on my last trip south, I wound up witnessing a fatal accident. I was only about 800 yards back when a girl attempting to pass a line of traffic and wound up head-on-ing a guy coming the other way. Just an all around s#!t situation. The people she was trying to pass (there was a passing lane, FWIW) just kept going. I was thinking about it later, and she was easily far enough along side the one vehicle that they could obviously see her lose control and hit the other guy... None of them stopped. I was there for about 5 minutes before anybody came along the other way - luckily they stopped (2 people in one vehicle). Soon after a bunch of people came from the direction I was heading, and I don't think any of them stopped... And it was an obviously BAD accident scene, and it was obvious that 3 people were not enough to deal with it.

damn that sucks. i learned in my psycology class that when something like this happens. most people have the "someone else will help" mentality. :smart:
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damn that sucks. i learned in my psycology class that when something like this happens. most people have the "someone else will help" mentality. :smart:

 

 

I read a book about that, called 'Influence, Science and Practice' By Dr Robert D Caldini (think I got that all right) and would recommend it if you're interested in the subject. He spelled out the phenomenon fairly well, and why people think that way.

 

Mostly I read the book because its great for dealing with salesmen.

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A few years ago I pulled a flower delivery van out of a snow bank in front of my house. Guy gave me a certificate for a free rose. I used the cert. and gave the rose to my then wife.

 

2 days later the same guy in the same van mistook a farm field access road for a driveway and got hopelessly stuck in the mud under the snow 1/4 from where I work. So I got the Suburban and spent 45 minutes dragging him back all the way back to the road. Didn't get a certificate this time, but he did ask for my name. When I got home the wife told me the flower van had been there, just stopped in front of the house for a few minutes, then drove off. :dunno:

 

3 days later I get a package in the mail. It's a box of gourmet chocolates, crackers, cheese and a bottle of wine!

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hey, don't get me wrong, i am more than willing to help without expecting anything. i just ask for a thanks or that they pay it forward. it just ticks me off when they damage my stuff or don't even say thanks.

 

on the big plus side, i got a text to check my mailbox yesterday. i checked it and found a $40 gas card! it's from the gal a couple doors down that i snowblow out all the time. she had a big thanks on the card. it was so nice to get a thanks like that. she did it as a gas card thinking it would help pay for the gas i use in the snowblower. i thanked her and said it would take care of the gas to do her place for the rest of the year. i do alot for her (she's a single mother with a house) to keep her house up, her car, etc.. she always thanks me, so i can't complain about her at all. it was just so nice getting that card from her. i feel bad because she only has her income, but that's also why it means so much. i will be happy to continue to help her out, as i would've before.

 

i also helped a friend move this weekend. she is going through a divorce (and her x malested her daughter) so she needs all the help she can get. i do alot for her and she's not even in a position that she could give me gas money for hauling trailer loads across town. i am happy to help her, anyway i can. today, she decided i should take all the tools. there isn't much and they're cheap ones, but it's the thought that counts. she knows i'm into tools. it was nice of her. i'll put them in a tool box and leave them at the dog club so i don't have to haul tools back and forth as much. i can always use tools! ;)

 

i tell you, after last week, these 2 people really helped me feel appreciated. i thank them. :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

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I used to help out way more then I do now. I used to be "that guy" who had anything and everything someone needed to fix their rig. I always gave the most killer deals too. Then it came to past that ppl started expecting me to fix/give parts to them :no: So unless the person who is broke on the trail or on the side of the road is actively trying to better their situation I sit back and watch and give advice.

 

 

ON a side note what the Sunday school class I belong to did for the "forgotten" helpers at church was, we made them fruit baskets and gave them to them the weekend before Christmas. I totally believe in paying it forward when it is possible as well. All you have to do is ask Jeff about that. I think he built most of his jeep from stuff laying around in my yard...and we always worked it out :cheers:

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