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Griping About Selling Online


kryptronic
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I've got a big gripe.  Lately I've been listing parts and vehicles on various marketplaces like the Comanche Club classifieds and Facebook Marketplace. 

 

I've got a vehicle listed on FB, and over the past three weeks, I've had three people swear to me they're showing up the following day to purchase a vehicle, then they don't show up, and I never hear from them again.  I can't tell you how many people have asked if the vehicle is available and when they get an affirmative reply from me, I never hear another word.  Not even a "thanks, I was just wondering".

 

I've got parts listed here on CC.  Several times I've been asked for a shipping quote on an item and for pics.  After spending the time to get weights, measurements, pics and a shipping quote along with replying to the requestor, I hear nothing back.  Not even a thank you for my time or efforts.  I'm tempted to list some members names here in some sort of "wall of shame", but I won't.

 

It seems the younger the buyer is, the less they care about courtesy.  Older buyers typically respond to messages quickly and show up when they say they are going to. Younger people just don't have the same manners (generally - there are exceptions like military personnel).  It's really been annoying me lately.  It take it as selfish.  If I spend any time at all doing something for somebody (like issuing a quote, or replying to a message), I expect at least a "thank you, but I'll pass" in return. 

 

The cutoff for having decent manners seems to be 40 years old or so.  Is ghosting sellers now the acceptable method for relaying disinterest?  What feeds this behavior?  Is it really the new norm cease communication to express disinterest?  I'm feeling disrespected every time this happens, and I'm wondering what the heck is wrong with society that we let this kind of thing go without a fuss. 

 

I'm not sure what the purpose of this thread is other than to vent a little.  Perhaps people could share similar experiences, or perhaps some younger members could explain this phenomenon, or maybe assure us that all is not going to hell in a hand basket.  Maybe somebody in the habit of ghosting sellers will read this and learn their behavior is undesirable.  Who knows.  Thoughts welcome.  Ugh.

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I mean it seems to be but even from the buyers prospective(me) seems to have the same “ghosting” issue too. I’ve inquired about things on Facebook asking if they’re available before either going and seeing it or wasting my time with the person. I’ve had it to where I’ll ask and I’ll hear nothing and then the item is gone or I’ll get a couple words back and then the person will stop responding and never respond again. Lately I’ve had good luck with some folks over there cause life gets busy and I just check in showing I’m still interested. 
 

But I think eBay is the worst place right now. I’ll get folks who throw an offer out and I’ll accept and then they message me after I accept their offer asking about the part and I just end up canceling their order and tell them to do their research before buying parts willynilly. 
 

Now granted I am guilty of leaving some people hanging when selling parts and that’s entirely my bad as life gets busy. 
 

I do agree though, it sucks having time wasted on a potential sale. What’s more worse to that is say here at the dealer, I pull parts only for the driver to get to our customer to basically say “oh we cancelled that.” Apparently it’s hard to pick up the phone and say we no long need the part. 

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33 minutes ago, eaglescout526 said:

I mean it seems to be but even from the buyers prospective(me) seems to have the same “ghosting” issue too....

 

...Apparently it’s hard to pick up the phone and say we no long need the part. 

 

Yes, sellers do this too.  I've experienced it and have wondered whether people are just too lazy to mark items as sold.  It does seem too hard for some people to give the common courtesy of a short message or call when they no longer need/want/care about whatever the thing might be.

 

35 minutes ago, krustyballer16 said:

I just don't think anybody likes you Nick...emoji1745.png lol

 

You know me.  I don't care.  My dad always told me he didn't care if I liked him, but I damn well better respect him.  Maybe that's where this is coming from.  I'm expecting common courtesy from my fellow human beings and don't feel I'm getting it.

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33 minutes ago, kryptronic said:

 

Yes, sellers do this too.  I've experienced it and have wondered whether people are just too lazy to mark items as sold.  It does seem too hard for some people to give the common courtesy of a short message or call when they no longer need/want/care about whatever the thing might be.

 

 

You know me.  I don't care.  My dad always told me he didn't care if I liked him, but I damn well better respect him.  Maybe that's where this is coming from.  I'm expecting common courtesy from my fellow human beings and don't feel I'm getting it.

 

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I was raised to respect other people’s time. That is very irritating to me too. I don’t understand how someone can knowingly, and deliberately, do it. I get life getting busy, but there aren’t that many people that could possibly be that busy. I’d say it has to be close to 80% of the people I’ve tried to sell things to on FB Marketplace. 
 

I guess there are reasons that I prefer to collect instead of sell…

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Funny this topic comes up now. I messaged someone about an ATV for sale on FB market last night, and no response. Then I looked at the comments to the ad and there are 20+ replies. Looks like a bunch of teenagers are just taunting the seller and making sarcastic remarks about both the price and the item for sale. They even replied with memes. WTF? Makes it hard for someone like me with good intentions to break through the noise and try to get the guys attention. I gave up and moved on. 

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I've met young guys that were model humans, I've met old guys that would swindle you out of your lunch for fun.  just gotta look out for the losers and ignore their efforts to bring us down to their level. 

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Yeah, it’s not just young guys. When I was in my early 20’s, I actually spoke on the phone with a guy about a car he was selling, told him I would show up with a trailer to buy it, he knew when I was going to get there and that I was coming from 200 miles away, and we both had each other’s phone number. So I go and borrow the truck, rent the trailer, make the drive and knock on his door, and he tells me he already sold it to someone else and closes the door in my face. Guy looked like he was in his 40’s, and didn’t even bother trying to get in touch, didn’t care that I came so far. 
I ended up buying my first Comanche instead that summer, and I don’t know I actually needed a rough as hell ‘81 Firebird at the time so I guess it did work out, but it still burns thinking about it. 
I suppose it could’ve been that he just didn’t want to sell it to some dumb kid, but that’s another rant for a different thread. 
 

I personally have a mental health condition that leads to me seeing something shiny and totally blanking on a conversation I was having and going off and doing something else completely unrelated, sometimes for weeks before I remember about it. But I usually try to pick up the conversation again or at least apologize when I realize I did it. 

 

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8 hours ago, fiatslug87 said:

In general, each progressive generation has worse manners. And I blame social media for the trend increasing exponentially.:soapbox:

Don't be so quick to blame social media.  I believe it to be more of a parenting/ family unit issue.  But that is a discussion for another time and place.

 

 

I think alot of the issue is communicating digitally makes it easier to be "rude".  It takes less balls to hit the decline/ ignore button, than it does to tell someone no.  Just keep in mind one bad apple won't spoil the whole bunch. 

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I used to sell stuffon Facebook marketplace and most were successful and respectful. But lately all I get are is it available and after answering yes, nothing more. I've noticed lately a lot of sellers putting in their ads, "Will not reply to Is This Still Available."


89 Comanche
Eliminator
2wd
4.0L
5 speed PukeGoat
Factory Original


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On 10/22/2021 at 5:51 PM, kryptronic said:

 I'm tempted to list some members names here in some sort of "wall of shame", but I won't.

I would. Asking for a shipping quote is showing interest in an item. Leaving the seller hanging after an adequate (and knowing you, I'm sure it was adequate) reply is rude and conduct unbecoming of a member of this forum. I'm not saying someone has to buy something after asking for a shipping quote, but if they're going to play games, I can too.

 

I'm somewhat disheartened by the amount of generation-bashing in this thread, but maybe I come from a biased background. I think every generation has the same amount of a$$holes, but social media has made access to them so much easier. I've met good and bad people of all varieties.

 

Ghosting people isn't limited to just selling truck parts, though.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I put up with it for a long time and then eventually just stopped. I have the parts so they can waste the time and money themselves. Learn to let it go, toss the stuff, crunch it, trade with like minded people, hold it hostage, or whatever. It's yours. You earned it so do what you want. Hell enjoy it that much more rotting in the corner collecting dust or tossing it in the trash just knowing that many people are butt hurt over it. I know I am right now with that group of clowns wasting the time money and effort. It's even better knowing each day that goes by more mj specific interiors dissapear. I won't run out but I can't say the same for the clowns.

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Well I could have been one of the "named" prospective buyers by one of our other members, but I did eventually get back to him and was glad he was understanding.  I was raised "better", but man life has a way of making it rough sometimes.

 

I agree that the acceptable behavior in online transactions has gone the wrong way given the

 

My experience, having bought five used vehicles over the last three years along with other misc. items from people of all walks of life has all been very positive.  I know many others have not been so lucky and I know I've fallen down a bit on this lately myself.  I try to reserve judgement, since I don't know the anonymous person on the other end of the transactions circumstances.

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When I was looking for a SBC for my truck I had two guys contact me and I drove to check them out. One drive was an hour. The jerk never showed. Wouldn’t answer his phone. 
     Another guy had a 383 stroker for a good price but he was 3 hours away. I grilled his wife about the condition and she said it was excellent. I drive there and the heads were off and the cylinders were scratched pretty bad. I really considered punching the jerk but he was deaf and his little girl was signing for him and I wouldn’t do that in front of her.

     I live 6 miles out in the country and I hate driving to town to get a shipping quote. Costs are going up and I’ve really screwed myself a couple times so I’ve started charging what seems to much to some. 

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I've got a story that I think beats anything the current generation pulls. This goes back to the early 1980s, when I was married to my second wife.

 

I was finally ready to sell my 1968 Javelin, that I had bought new with my Vietnam combat pay. It had the 343 c.i.d. V8 (which was the largest available when I ordered it -- the 390 came out later in 1968), the "go package," limited slip rear axle, several suspension tweaks (I was heavily into autocross and time trials in those days), and a recent engine rebuild. My then mother-in-law lived on a busy road in a town full of gearheads, so we parked it in her front yard with a "For Sale" sign in the window, the price, and my telephone number.

 

Had a call from a guy who said he loved it and really REALLY wanted it. So we made an appointment for me to meet him a the MIL's place at 6:00 p.m. one evening after work.

 

I was there at 6:00. He wasn't. He also wasn't there at 6:15, or 6:30. I had a phone number, so at around 6:45 p.m. I called. His father answered, and said he had no idea where his son was. At 7:00 there was a knock on the door. MIL answered. It was NOT the prospective buyer I had the appointment with, it was a kid who was one of my wife's students (she was a high school English teacher). He was a nice kid, very polite. He took it for a test drive, liked it, gave me a big deposit, and we arranged to finalize the paperwork the following Saturday. He left, and I went home.

 

Around 9:30 that night I got a phone call at home from prospective buyer #1, asking about "his" car. I informed him that it wasn't "his" car, that I had waited over an hour for him and couldn't reach him, and that the car was now sold -- to someone else. The guy went totally bat $#!& crazy over the phone. He kept telling me that I had no right to sell "his" car, that we had a deal (we didn't, we were going to meet so he could test drive it), and he was going to sue me.

 

I finally told him where to go and hung up on him.

 

Ten years later I had another guy pull a similar routine when I was selling a full-size Cherokee with a snow plow. Yeah -- they're out there.

 

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12 minutes ago, kansashogan said:

     I live 6 miles out in the country and I hate driving to town to get a shipping quote. Costs are going up and I’ve really screwed myself a couple times so I’ve started charging what seems to much to some. 

 

No need to drive into town.

 

https://www.theupsstore.com/tools/estimate-shipping-cost

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The USPS is a lot cheaper than UPS. I try to charge as little as possible. I tried shipping some rocker/cab corners recently that I spent twenty bucks bubble wrapping and shrink wrapping and the local UPS shipper told me they couldn’t ship it that way. Still have them because the guy lived ten hours away.

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10 hours ago, kansashogan said:

The USPS is a lot cheaper than UPS. I try to charge as little as possible. I tried shipping some rocker/cab corners recently that I spent twenty bucks bubble wrapping and shrink wrapping and the local UPS shipper told me they couldn’t ship it that way. Still have them because the guy lived ten hours away.

I have learned that you can ship the same package, to the same place, with the same clerk, at the same store, and get a different rate unless it's a flat rate type deal. There is no rhyme or reason at one particular place. Shipping day and time is a factor. It's weird I worked long haul primarily at Old Dominion Freight as a supervisor for a stint. Recently I had a member take a screenshot of a prepaid shipping receipt. I just had to print it out. That is the best way ever and simplest. Let the buyer spend the time, energy, and they will if they are serious. It leaves much more flexibility on pricing or willingness to help out a stranger when they put forth equal effort and just don't come blazing with drama.

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6 hours ago, saveevryjp1998 said:

I have learned that you can ship the same package, to the same place, with the same clerk, at the same store, and get a different rate unless it's a flat rate type deal. There is no rhyme or reason at one particular place. Shipping day and time is a factor. It's weird I worked long haul primarily at Old Dominion Freight as a supervisor for a stint. Recently I had a member take a screenshot of a prepaid shipping receipt. I just had to print it out. That is the best way ever and simplest. Let the buyer spend the time, energy, and they will if they are serious. Lives much more flexibility on pricing or willingness to help out a stranger when they put forth equal effort and just don't come blazing with drama.

That’s a good idea, I didn’t know that option existed. Thanks

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I drove over 3 hours one time to buy a car I found on Facebook as it was exactly what I was looking for. About 15 minutes from the destination the woman told me it had been bought that morning by someone else. Never even mentioned that anyone else was coming to look at it. It's not just a buyer thing.

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I posted a camper for sale on a Sunday afternoon on FB marketplace. Got a lot of interest, and each time I said first come, first serve, and I was available whenever. Had a guy say he wanted to come Monday, I said sure. Had another guy that decided to come Sunday night, put down a deposit, and was going to pick it up later in the week. After I told the first guy, he was absolutely livid--he actually originally said "that sucks" and then messaged me again hours later, going crazy.

 

He wasn't the only person that had scheduled a time--it's not my fault you couldn't get here before someone else?

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I definitely encounter this a lot on FB, my products allow me to include shipping in my price though so having the whole thing setup through FB keeps me from waiting on buyers.

 

My biggest complaint happened today.
The first time I received negative feedback the buyer said  a panel broke due to "pressure from switches" making it sound like it broke during use.  When I contacted him he said he used long connectors, probably the heatshrink type. He tried to use the panel to force them to fit. So it was between my panel or 12 connectors on which was going to break first.

His review certainly leaves that out... It makes it sound like they broke during operation when it wasn't even reasonable installation.

 

 

On 11/22/2021 at 6:35 AM, coheed said:

I drove over 3 hours one time to buy a car I found on Facebook as it was exactly what I was looking for. About 15 minutes from the destination the woman told me it had been bought that morning by someone else. Never even mentioned that anyone else was coming to look at it. It's not just a buyer thing.

 

That's messed up, I always hold something when someone's driving no matter what comes up.

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It's just the way a lot of people are these days.  I have it happen with people of all ages.  The ones that actually show up to buy stuff though tend to be really nice, down to earth people.  I try to avoid buying stuff from Craigslist or marketplace unless something is a really good deal or I can only find it used on those platforms.

 

For the stuff I make and sell I stick to eBay mostly as they can buy and pay immediately.  On a few occasions I've had people cancel and reorder due to a wrong address or payment info but otherwise it's super smooth there.  I don't have time to keep up with people's antics on Facebook or similar so I just don't list there, however I'm expanding and bringing some help on board at the start of the year so they can do all the social media and direct sales stuff so I don't have to deal with it. :D

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